A place for my weirdness

I'm making a list of the links on johnb_daily  eventually this will be posted there, but I am slow and methodical, making a list first then adding links as I find them.  be patient with me, I am also including everything I have on Megaupload and Youtube (eventually)

Last Update - 14-02-08 - red and bold

  
This is an on going project that I am updating all the time,  it will probably change every day for a while, so keep checking :)

I've now dated this ahead so it stays on top and is easier for me to find when I update :)

Anyone who feels the need to remove me from their Flist after this should feel free. 

Today has been shit, not a bit shit, Really really shit.

So, I thought, lets have a bit of fic to cheer me up; but no, what I found instead was people insulting my friends for no discernible reason.

Here's a reality check people,

I found out this morning that a guy I went to school with was killed in Afghanistan a few weeks ago, add this to the fact that I have lost two friends to AIDS and one to cancer in recent months, and to my divorce and having to move a 100 miles away from my friends and leave my cats behind and I am having the kind of year that nobody needs.

When I go to a concert or any other place I have fun (which is rare) I am not thinking "that person has had more pictures taken than me" or "must protect the poor helpless famous person".  If I'm thinking anything other that "this is fun" it's most likely to be "Dennis would have loved this" or "I wish Caroline had live long enough to come with me".

So I have a question,  why are you letting what other people do affect how you enjoy your evening?  chill out, if you don't like someone then ignore them.

Try this as a rule :  If you wouldn't want to hear something said about you, don't say it about someone else.

And if you still feel you really have to say it, say it somewhere private and be mindful of other peoples feelings.

There is no excuse for rudeness or cruelty. 

Lets face it, the guys in the band are grown ups, they don't seem to have a problem, and if they do they are perfectly capable of saying something.  They are not complaining, so why should anyone else.

Now I'm going to go and plan my next trip.  To a cemetery in Colchester.  Wish me luck, or not, whatever.

Rhetorical question, obviously I don't expect anyone to answer it.

But, really, what the hell is the matter with me?  I'm watching a bloody Christmas movie  (Love Actually)  and it actually made me CRY!  wtf!?!

I was in a good mood before hand, and I'm still watching it.  Common sense says TURN IT OFF!

But NO, I'm still watching it.

I need a brain transplant, or a sharp slap, or a hug maybe.   But mostly I need to stop watching this bloody movie!

My mind really worries me
My brain spat this out while waiting for the bus. 

I don't know how many people have tagged me now, but its a few, so i thought i ought to finally do this

The Rules:
1. Each player starts with 8 random facts/habits about themselves.
2. People who are tagged, write a blog post about their own 8 random things, and post these rules.
3. At the end of your post you need to tag 8 people.


ok so people to tag, I think most of my flist have already been hit, but here goes anyway

jades_shadow , burntcopper , mistressslash , crowson75 , seize , irener , jovialien and bethany_288

There is absolutely no purpose to this post, i just realised i can post from my new phone, so i am giving it a try. Is it wrong to be so impressed that im doing this on a bus?

Go read this blog  http://baldyblog.freshblogs.co.uk/

GIve some serious thought to becoming a bone marrow donor,  for the sake of a few days discomfort you could save a life.

My ex did this, the child he saved turned out to be a distant relative, he is now grown up, healthy and happy.

When my muse needed a donor, there was no one on the register who matched, and we lost her.

If you are between 18 and 45 you could be a donor, all you have to do to register is give a blood sample.  

When my ex donated he first gave a further sample for testing, then, when that matched, he went to the royal free hospital in hampstead,  he was there for 2 nights,  they knocked him out, extracted bone marrow from his hip, watched him for a few hours and sent him home.  He had a bruise on his arse and was a bit dehydrated, but he was back at work 3 days later.  There were no side effects from donating, and he saved a life.

What have you got to lose by doing this?  

Think about it , PLEASE

As promised on Janto_weekly, here are the Calendars I made at the end of last year,  John Barrowman, Gareth David Lloyd and David Tennant

There are days, not many, but at the same time too many, when all you need is a hug; or if you can't have that, then a touch, even the casual touch of a stranger, to make you feel a part the world. 

On those days the lack of that touch can be the most devastating thing.  You feel disconnected, alone, lonely.  No matter how many people you speak to, nothing compensates for the lack of touch.

Touch is the thing that grounds us, makes us part of the group, makes us feel.  If you are denied touch for long periods it can drive you to insanity.

How long is too long to go with out touching, with out feeling; Not sexually, just affection, contact;  A week, a month, a year, 5 years.

How alone are you when you know the time, date, and location of the last touch you felt and the one before that, and before that. 

How long can you hold on to the memory of someone holding your hand or touching your arm, before you need to feel that touch again, to refresh that memory.

How long do you keep counting touches before you've given in to insanity?

Or abandoned plot bunnies, or even abandoned fic that needs a rewrite or just finishing off.

I really want to get back to writting properly but my imagination seems to have deserted me.  Its been a while since I managed to produce anything on my own and the rare bits and pieces I do produce are when something reminds me of my muse (long, sad story, not gonna go there at the moment). 

I need to get back into the habit of writting without her and I don't seem to be able to do that; I have ideas but they evaporate when I'm faced with a piece of paper or a keyboard.

So, anyone got anything they need help with, or a bunny up for adoption?  anything.  

I'm so frustrated with myself,  I haven't  even been able to sketch anything in the last couple of months and thats unheard of for me,  I scribble all the time.

HELP!

please?

Sharing a little something I discovered a while ago.

Listen to 'Another side' , It's OK, right?

now do it again and fiddle with the 63, 400 and 1kHz settings.

I've turned them WAY UP, and its a vast improvement,  more JB and less backing music.

The guys who did the mixing on this album NEED TO BE FIRED, its terrible.  I should not have to fiddle with settings this much to get decent sound.

gonna crank up the volume now,  maybe fiddle some more with the bass and treble, just to see what happens :)

I am just about ready to give up hope of my concert ticket arriving before I leave for Cardiff.  If it does not turn up I will be really pissed off.

But I have been promised a visit to the Dr Who Exhibition, so I'll be going to Cardiff anyway :)

Considering how much I had to spend you can expect much bitching and moaning if I can't see JB on monday, followed by much shouting down the phone and A VIsa claw back on tuesday.

Umm, My mood now seems to have shifted from weepy to irrationally angry.  Weird and slightly worrying :(

well actually I only want one ticket,  for JB's Cardiff concert.

And I need some opinions/advise.  I normally book so far in advance for stuff I want to see that I've never looked for last minute or sold out tickets before.

LONDONTICKETSEXPRESS.com are showing tickets from £35,  but I've never heard of them and I'm a bit worried about buying from a company that say they will try to get you a ticket but won't refund if they can't.

Has anyone used them?  are they any good?  or can anyone recommend a good ticket agency/exchange that has tickets available and wont cost me 4 times the face value.

I wasn't going to go, but I now have a long weekend that week and I'd really like to go.

Any help would be greatly appreciated :)

I made a few Icons today, and then I found the last of the icons I KNEW I had on my PC somewhere

So  there are a lot of icons here.

Help yourself,  fell free to use as bases if you want, but please credit if you do and ,maybe let me know so I can have a look :)

Was hanging around the magazines in Tesco today,  didn't actually want yo buy anything, but I was waiting for someone so I decided to read the JB bit in Heat while I was waiting.

So I'm standing there minding my own business,  drooling over JB and a woman I have never seen before in my life walks up and says 'Ooooh,  he's lovely isn't he?  have you seen his partner, he's lovely too!' 

Nothing to disagree with there, so I agreed and went back to looking at the mag, she wandered off toward the electrical stuff and I thought that was it.

But no!

2 minutes later she came running back, laughing like a loon and headed straight for me.  She waved vaguely at the magazine I was still drooling over and creased up laughing.   After several seconds of wondering if  I should back away and be afraid, she calmed down a bit and grinned at me, she still looked a bit crazy.   Then she asked me if I knew it was Bruce Forsyth's 80th birthday today, as it happened I did, but I still wasn't sure she was sane.

then she says something like "Singing, Talent searches, Royal Variety, dancing on Striclty, day time TV and now Games shows,  Johns turning into Bruce Forsyth" 

ROFLMAO,  at this point I think the other customers were backing away from both of us.  We laughed like crazies until her husband turned up with a trolley and some electrical stuff,  and she wandered off to pay,still laughing.

I still have no idea who she was, but she was a well needed bit of light relief in an otherwise shitty day. 

If you are a petite red head with a very puzzled blond husband and a blue ford focus,  who was in Tesco in Basildon around 1pm today,  SAY HI, introduce yourself, and thanks for lightening my lunch time.

wallpaper again, help youself :)

and icons

I really need to get a job!

I'm becoming nocturnal again, and I know from experience that once I get into being awake at night, It will be hell trying to get back to ordinary days.

The last time this happened I spent 3 weeks wearing dark glasses, because daylight was too bright. 

Was bored today so I fiddled with my layout.
Now I'm not sure if I like it,  I think I probably do, but I'm not 100% sure.

What do you think?  Keep it? Change it?

I might have to let it grow on me for a few days

Baby Benjamin weighed in at nearly nine pounds and is very long,  with big hands and feet,  gonna be tall, like his dad.

  Sis had an epidural so she's gonna be stuck in hospital until tomorrow evening.  Baby Ben is apparently screaming blue murder, and everyone else is just glad he's finally here.  :)

Made some more stuff  :)   Once I get started I just can't stop.


   

Credit for the pic in the last one must go to fairyd123,  and what a lovely pic it is :)

I also found some more icons in my ongoing attempt to organise my harddrive,  there are a few new ones and the rest have been around for a while.